Cards Against Galaxy Angel
by StevieBond
Summary: The six angels play a card game called Cards Against Humanity with surprising results! This story will contain some strong language, crude innuendos and several references that will range from sexual to dark. Do not read if you're sensitive or easily offended. Be aware that there may be a few custom cards that I've written specifically for this story.
1. Round One

**Hey folks, if you ever heard of Cards Against Humanity then you should already guess where this may end up going, enjoy. :)**

* * *

Round One

Another day of searching for Lost Technology across the Galaxy was over and the Angels were back on the Elsior. Chitose and Forte had their turn to explore and among the usual pile of junk, they came across a card game and after a day or two of finding out how to play it, they came up with an idea for a slumber party in Chitose's room.

Two days had passed and the slumber party had begun with all six of the angels together.

"Alright girls, what is this card game that you found?" Ranpha asked as they sat around in a circle.

Chitose picked up the card box and showed them the front cover.

 _ **Cards against Humanity** **  
**A party game for horrible people_

"Horrible people?" Mint commented. "That doesn't sound fun."

"We're not horrible, are we?" Milfie asked worryingly.

"Don't worry, it's just a tagline." Forte replied. "Chitose and I gave it a try a few days ago when we came back."

"From what we can tell, this game can go in several directions." Chitose said.

"But it's not to be taken seriously, it's all in good fun." Forte added. "We thought we could loosen up a bit and perhaps learn a side about ourselves that we never dare show."

"So how does the game work?" Vanilla asked.

"This card game contains two decks, one with white cards and one with black cards." Chitose explained. "We each take ten white cards from the deck and then we each take turn being the Card Queen."

"Even though it says Card Czar, we're not men." Forte added. "So we went with Card Queen instead."

Chitose began sorting out the cards and Forte shuffled them like a professional poker player.

"So anyways, the card queen draws a black card which will either have a question or a fill-in-the-blank sentence." Chitose continued. "The Card Queen reads what it says and then everyone else picks a white card to answer the question or fill in the blank. Your aim is to pick the funniest answer in your hand to match with the black card. Once you've chosen a white card, the card queen reads the question again and then reads the answers before choosing the answer that's the funniest."

Forte was done with the card shuffling so she carried on with the rules. "Whoever plays that answer gets the black card and it becomes an Awesome Point. Then the next player becomes Card Queen, while everyone draws back white cards until they have ten again. At the end of the game, the player with the most Awesome Points wins."

"Awesome points, eh?" Ranpha asked. "That sounds like my kind of game!"

Mint slightly frowned. "That sounds easy enough, but it would depend on the cards."

Forte grinned. "Well since Chitose and I have played this game, we know that it can get either wild, sexual, stupid or dark."

"Well wild or not, I wanna play this!" Milfie said happily.

"I'm not backing out of this game." Ranpha added. "I wanna see how horrible this gets."

"Well since you all want to, I guess I'll play as well." Mint sighed.

"I understand everyone's answers." Vanilla said. "I'll play too."

"Okay so we're all playing." Chitose declared. "I think we should start in alphabetical order, so that way, we can show you how the game works."

All the others agreed as they began to draw their white cards till they each had ten. Forte looked at the other girls expressions when they looked at their cards, Milfie was gasping every two seconds, Mint was showing a look of disgust with her bunny ears flapping about and Ranpha had the face of when she had a full monty in her room one time.

Vanilla turned away and delivered a short prayer. "Oh lord, please forgive everything that's about to happen."

"I'm not so sure about this now." Mint said worryingly.

"Aww come on, don't be a chicken costume." Milfie said. "Besides, I made these special cakes in case of card game emergencies."

"You count playing card games as an emergency?" Forte asked.

Milfie looked at her sheepishly. "Uhhh yeah."

"Okay girls, we're ready to start?" Chitose asked and they all nodded as she picked up a black card at the top of the pile and read it. "What will always get you laid?"

"Hmm, the question alone is flirtatious enough." Mint said as she looked at her cards.

Forte shrugged. "Well this isn't a good start for me."

"Most of what I have is just wrong, so I'll get rid of this one." Ranpha chuckled.

"Might as well get rid of the worst card I have." Milfie sighed.

Vanilla remained silent, choosing her card forward.

Chitose picked up the chosen five white cards and shuffled them to randomize it a bit. She picked up the black card again and read it once more. "Alright, what will always get you laid?" She picked up the first white card on top and read out the answer. "Guns."

Forte raised an eyebrow.

Chitose continued reading the cards. "A balanced breakfast."

"Well after a bit of you know what, isn't that normal?" Ranpha asked.

"Party poopers."

"That wouldn't happen if I was the one planning a party." Milfie said.

"Obesity."

"Laaaaaame!" Ranpha commented.

Chitose blushed at the last card "And last one is...hormone injections."

Ranpha and Forte laughed.

"That sounds painful." Mint said before giggling. "But it is kind of funny."

"Now you're getting it." Forte replied. "So Chitose, who wins that one?"

Chitose looked at the answers. "Well, some of these were okay, but hormone injections got the most laughs. Who drew that card?"

Vanilla raised her hand and smiled slightly.

"Ahhh, I should've known you would've played that." Chitose said. "Good one, Vanilla."

"Thanks." Vanilla replied as Chitose gave her the black card and put it aside.

"Okay, I'm up next." Forte said, picking up the next black card as the other girls drew white cards till they had ten again. "What's the next Happy Meal toy?"

"Oh this could work." Chitose said, immediately choosing her card.

"A tasteless card or one that makes sense, that's the question." Mint said quietly before picking her card.

"I think I've got this." Ranpha said hopefully.

The rest of the girls drew their cards and Forte picked them up. "Okay let's see what you all got. What's the next Happy Meal toy?" She read the first white card. "Hot people."

"Well if the boys are as handsome as their real selves, I wouldn't mind buying a collection." Ranpha commented. "I could exercise off the happy meals too."

"Dream on, girl." Forte carried on. "Golden showers."

"Whoever made this game, lost technology or not, must've been one disturbed individual!" Mint exclaimed.

"Finger painting."

"Oh that sounds nice." Milfie said. "Maybe we should do that for our next picnic."

"Ghosts."

The girls, apart from Chitose, shivered, the time when they got stuck in a ghost ship that turned out to be one huge gym was scary enough.

"And lastly, multiple stab wounds."

"That's…not right." Vanilla said.

Forte sighed. "Well this was a dud round, but multiple stab wounds gets that one."

"Gimme!" Ranpha replied as Forte handed the black card over.

"Over to you next, Milfie." Chitose said.

"Okay!" Milfie replied, picking up a black card. "I got 99 problems, but blank ain't one."

"Finally, a good chance to use this card!" Forte said happily.

"I'm getting rid of this one." Chitose muttered.

The others remained quiet, choosing their cards until Milfie had five white cards and read each one with the black card. "Okay, I got 99 problems, but man meat ain't one."

Forte snickered.

"I got 99 problems, but crystal meth ain't one."

"I remember Almo and Coco sharing that, once." Chitose said.

"I got 99 problems, but bitching ain't one."

The other girls laughed apart from Vanilla who just smiled, even Chitose joined in.

Milfie continued reading the cards. "I got 99 problems, but being rich ain't one."

"Tell me about it." Mint giggled.

"And finally, I got 99 problems, but...oh god, this is wrong!"

"Whatever it is, you just have to read it." Chitose encouraged.

"Alright, I got 99 problems, but kids with ass cancer ain't one."

Forte and Ranpha nearly fell over in laughter.

"Oh that one is amazing!" Ranpha exclaimed.

"Yeah, that is quite funny." Milfie said. "It may have been wrong, but that last card wins it."

Forte smirked, "Ha! Told you I had the best one for that." Milfie handed the card over to her.

"Guess it's my turn now." Mint said, picking up a black card. "What are my parents hiding from me?"

"Oh I can think of several things." Ranpha replied, looking at her cards.

The other girls were quick to get their cards in and Mint picked them up. "Let's see what my parents are hiding from me?" she read the first white card. "The Donald Trump seal of approval."

"Who's that?" Milfie asked.

"How should I know?" Mint went back to the cards. "A brain tumour."

"And here comes the dark side." Vanilla said.

Mint shook her head. "A sea of troubles."

"We get enough of that in space, never mind that huge ocean planet." Forte commented.

"Next one is...oh this is just awful!" Mint sighed. "A...stray...pube."

"HAHAHAHA!" Milfie laughed.

"Oh my god!" Ranpha exclaimed in fits of laughter.

"Oh that one is gonna be hard to beat!" Forte added, laughing away.

Mint felt disgusted but carried on reading. "Last one is...hot cheese."

"Mmmm, cheese." Milfie said.

"Well honestly, as much as it disgusted me, stray pube is the clear winner." Mint half-heartily declared. "Who had that one?"

"I did, actually." Chitose replied and Mint handed the card over.

"Woah! You played that one?" Ranpha asked.

Forte chuckled. "When you play this game for as long as I and Chitose have, you'll get used to it in time."

It was now Ranpha's turn to be card queen and she picked up the next one. "Oh, this one says to pick two."

"Ah that means you must use two cards to fill the blanks in." Chitose explained.

"I see." Ranpha read the card "Lifetime presents blank, the story of blank."

"Might as well get rid of these two." Mint said.

"Instant win!" Milfie exclaimed placing her two cards down.

Forte sighed. "Well I'm not winning this one."

Ranpha had all the cards in and read them out with the black card. "Lifetime presents Nickleback, the story of unfathomable stupidity."

"I think we saw a Nickleback CD in our discoveries once." Chitose said. "Did it get saved?"

"Yes, Noah took it along with the CD player we found as well." Vanilla replied.

"Ahem!" Ranpha intervened. "Lifetime presents oversized lollipops, the story of getting naked and watching Nickelodeon."

The girls stared at Mint who was concerned. "What? They're not my cards!"

"You sure about that?" Forte teased.

Ranpha carried on reading. "Moving right along, Lifetime presents civilian casualties, the story of Arnold Schwarzenegger."

"Sounds like a guy who could carry even the biggest weapon in the galaxy." Milfie said.

"Yeah right, I'm the only one who owns a golden revolver around here." Forte replied.

Ranpha shook her head, "Anyways, next one is...Lifetime presents daddy issues, the story of a murder most foul."

"Well this certainly got dark again." Chitose said.

"And depressing." Milfie added.

Ranpha spluttered at the last card. "Last one is...Lifetime presents whipping it out, the story of being a dick to children."

That one met with a few laughs. "Well it's a good thing we don't have that between our legs." Forte said loudly.

"Ewww, thanks for sharing." Ranpha replied. "I'll go with the oversize lollipops one, because I can actually see that happening on a show, who played these?"

Vanilla raised her hand.

"Nicely done, Vanilla." Ranpha gave her the black card.

"Thank you and it's also my turn." Vanilla replied. "So after my turn, this round will be over?"

"Well, I wasn't sure how long we're gonna play this for, but we'll think of an agreement after this." Chitose answered.

Vanilla picked up a card and read it. "What gets better with age?"

"Yeah I'm dumping a junk card here." Forte said.

"Count me in, none of the others work." Chitose added.

Ranpha grinned as she put down her card.

Vanilla said as she picked up the cards. "What gets better with age? Scientology."

"Well maybe." Mint replied.

"Customer service representatives."

"Meh!" Ranpha said.

"A sausage festival."

Mint and Ranpha giggled.

"Why are you two laughing about sausages?" Milfie asked.

"I don't think it means that kind of sausage." Forte corrected.

"Oh."

Vanilla continued. "Pretending to care."

"Yeah that's true." Forte joked. "I mean our commander is getting worse."

"At least you were joking." Vanilla replied. "Last one is...oh dear...a bleached asshole."

"EWWWW!" The girls said in unison.

"That is so gross!" Milfie complained.

"Oh that is just...I can't believe that!" Mint exclaimed.

"The last one is the winner." Vanilla said.

Ranpha got on her knees and took a bow. "Thank you, come again." She took the black card.

"Why, Ranpha, why?!" Milfie exclaimed.

"So that's the end of the first round and Ranpha and Vanilla are tied for the lead with two points." Chitose said.

"Oh yeah, how many rounds shall we do?" Milfie asked.

"Well, since we're likely to have no more work until tomorrow, how about we go for ten rounds?" Forte suggested.

"Ten?! You mean that we each take our turns, ten times?!" Mint asked.

"Well I like this game already and I'm not stopping." Ranpha said.

"Neither am I, even though it's a little strange, I'm having fun." Milfie added.

"I still have some amazing cards in waiting." Chitose added too.

"Okay then, we all agree to go for another nine rounds." Forte declared. "Let's have a quick break between rounds as well."

"Agreed." Mint replied. "Can we have those emergency cupcakes, Milfie?"

"Sure." Milfie replied, handing them out.

* * *

 **Galaxy Angel Awesome Points Scoreboard:**

 **Chitose Karasuma: 1**  
 **Forte Stollen: 1**  
 **Milfie Sakuraba: 0**  
 **Mint Blancmanche: 0**  
 **Ranpha Franboise: 2**  
 **Vanilla H: 2**


	2. Round Two

Round Two

After a short break of eating cupcakes later, the girls got themselves comfortable in a circle again.

"So we'll start in the same way as before." Chitose said, drawing a card. "A romantic candlelit dinner would be incomplete without blank."

"Finally, I can get rid of this dumb card." Ranpha said.

"I've got this one!" Milfie sang.

"Mine are no good, so this will have to do." Vanilla muttered.

Chitose gathered up the chosen cards and read them out. "A romantic candlelit dinner would be incomplete without…holding hands."

"Aww that's so romantic." Milfie replied.

"Yeah true." Ranpha added.

"A romantic candlelit dinner would be incomplete without dressing up."

"Well that would be true if I was with a guy." Mint commented.

"A romantic candlelit dinner would be incomplete without Cards against Humanity."

All of the girls laughed.

"I think it's too soon for that." Forte laughed.

"A romantic candlelit dinner would be incomplete without a bucket of fish heads."

"Yuck!" Mint said.

"And finally, a romantic candlelit dinner would be incomplete without a defective condom."

Ranpha chuckled.

"Aright, Cards against Humanity wins it because it was well timed." Chitose declared. "Who had that one?"

"ME!" Milfie replied as Chitose gave her the card.

"My turn." Forte said. "Oh it's a pick two again and I think from now on, we're going to find out who drew what, just to make it more interesting."

"Sounds good to me." Chitose replied with the others nodding in agreement.

"They said we were crazy, they said we couldn't put blank inside of blank, they were wrong."

Vanilla was the first to put her two cards forward. The rest of the girls took their time until Forte had each other girls pair in her hand.

"And we'll go in reverse alphabetical order to make it even more interesting." She said before looking at Vanilla's pair. "Uhhh Vanilla, are you sure you wanna play these two?"

"Yes." Vanilla said glumly. "I've been waiting to get rid of those two cards since the beginning."

"Alright." Forte read her cards. "They said we were crazy, they said we couldn't put dead space rabbits inside of a torture chamber, they were wrong."

None of the girls laughed and Vanilla looked away sadly. Chitose however was quick to diffuse the awkwardness by wrapping her arms around Vanilla in a comforting hug.

"Okay, moving on quickly." Forte read Ranpha's pair. "They said we were crazy, they said we couldn't put Lester Coolduras inside of a lunatic asylum, they were wrong!"

All of the girls laughed out loud, even Vanilla cheered up hearing that.

"Here's Mint's. They said we were crazy, they said we couldn't put eyeballs inside of an animatronic device, they were wrong."

"Seriously?" Ranpha asked.

"What?" Mint exclaimed. "They were the best cards I could match."

"Suuuuure." Forte replied before continuing. "They said we were crazy, they said we couldn't put tortoise shells inside of a go-kart, they were wrong. That's actually not bad, Milfie."

"Thanks." Milfie replied.

"Last pair from Chitose. They said we were crazy, they said we couldn't put flying sex snakes inside of an aeroplane, they were wrong."

"That kind of makes sense in some strange way." Mint said.

"My cards weren't good for this one." Chitose replied.

"Because it cheered up Vanilla, Ranpha's pair wins this, no question." Forte said, giving the card to Ranpha who danced her booty.

"Anything to cheer you girls up." Ranpha replied.

Milfie was next to draw a black card. "What's a girl's best friend?"

"Alright, time to get rid of this crazy card." Forte said.

Mint looked at Ranpha and then chose her card. "She's gonna hate me for this." She muttered, giggling.

Milfie had all the cards in and read them. "Let's see what's a girl's best friend is." She picked up the first white card. "My sex life."

The other girls laughed.

"Is there something you're not telling us?" Forte teased.

"Nope…next one is, uh oh…errr, a dumb blonde."

Ranpha was immediately displeased. "One of you is getting an ass kicking tonight!"

"Moving right along…invisible hands."

"I'm beginning to sense a theme." Vanilla said.

"Next is…hahahahaha!"

"Oh this should be good." Chitose said. "What does it say?"

"A s-s-s-sassy b-b-black woman." Milfie then fell backwards in fits of laughter.

"Oh that is brilliant!" Ranpha yelled before laughing too.

All the girls couldn't contain themselves and after a few minutes of calming down, they carried on.

"Okay, okay last one is…being rich."

"Well if you're a part of the Blamanche Corporation, that may be true." Mint said.

"That sassy card wins it!"

Forte folded her arms with a smug look. "Thank you kindly." She said, taking the card from Milfie.

It was Mint's turn again to draw a card. "What did I bring back from my vacation?"

Ranpha shrugged. "I'm dumping a useless card here."

"I have nothing good for this one." Vanilla moaned.

Mint gathered the chosen cards. "Alright, what did I bring back from my vacation?" she read the first card on her other hand. "Chunks of a dead hitchhiker."

"Woah! Since when did you commit murder?" Ranpha teased.

"I have done none of that, thank you." Mint continued. "Normad."

"If it was chunks of Normad, I couldn't even care less." Forte said.

"He was a microprocessor." Vanilla corrected. "Let's not forget."

"Moving along." Mint said. "A fine wine. Well my father does like the odd glass every now and then."

"That reminds me, do we have any wine on the ship?" Forte asked.

"I think Lester normally has a bottle in his office." Milfie replied.

"Anyways, girls…next one is…girl power."

"Well you can't go wrong with that, we are the greatest girls in the galaxy." Ranpha bragged.

"And last one is...a rocket launcher."

"Aww you shouldn't have, Mint." Forte chuckled.

"Hehe, that wasn't too bad girls, but I'm going with girl power, because it's fine to brag that we've saved the galaxy several times. Who had girl power?"

"Me again!" Milfie replied, taking the card.

"Here we go then." Ranpha said, drawing a black card, "Today on Transbaal TV: Help! My son is blank."

"Oh this should be good." Forte chuckled. "Well that's if I didn't have any crap cards right now."

Ranpha soon had five cards ready to read out. "Today on Transbaal TV: Help! My son is doing the right thing."

"That doesn't make sense." Mint said.

"Help! My son is being fat and stupid."

Forte laughed. "Sounds an awful lot like your little brothers."

"Harsh, but true." Ranpha replied. "Anyways. Help! My son is fisting."

"Isn't that another word for wrestling?" Milfie asked.

"Help! My son is getting shot out of a cannon."

All the girls laughed.

"Well why don't you go and save him?" Chitose teased.

"Ha! Far too early to be thinking of kids. Anyways last one. Help! My son is praying the gay away."

"Oh that is just wrong!" Milfie giggled.

"I wanna pick the fat and stupid but it might hurt my brothers if they ever found out about this game so I'm going for getting shot out of a cannon as the winner."

"YES! I have finally scored a point." Mint exclaimed as Ranpha gave her the card.

"Alright, my turn." Vanilla said, picking up the next card. "What's that smell?"

"That is my Chenard #5 perfume." Forte chuckled. "I'm just kidding."

The girls were quick to select their cards and Vanilla gathered them up. "So what's that smell…fiery poops?"

"Ewww!" Milfie said.

"Silence."

Everything went suddenly quiet.

"Well that one sucked." Ranpha said.

"We can do a lot better…next one is…old people smell."

All the girls laughed, even Vanilla shared a giggle.

"Next is, immortality cream."

"There's no such thing as that, well based on the lost technology we've seen." Mint said.

"Last one is…panda sex."

Ranpha and Forte snickered.

"Well, it could've been worse." Vanilla said.

"That's an understatement, based on what we've seen so far." Forte replied.

"I shall give old people smell the win, I just liked that one the best."

Ranpha grinned taking the card. "And here I thought I wasted a good card, thanks!"

"Alright, second round is over and Ranpha is in the lead." Chitose said. "Let's have another quick break before we continue."

The other girls nodded.

* * *

 **Galaxy Angel Awesome Points Scoreboard:**

 **Chitose Karasuma: 1**  
 **Forte Stollen: 2**  
 **Milfie Sakuraba: 1**  
 **Mint Blancmanche: 2**  
 **Ranpha Franboise: 4**  
 **Vanilla H: 2**


	3. Round Three

Round Three

"So we ready girls?" Chitose asked. "I never understood blank until I encountered blank."

"Another pick two already? None of mine fit this at all." Mint sighed.

"I gotta waste two good cards on this one?" Ranpha moaned.

Chitose gathered them up and read them in reverse order as before. "Vanilla's is I never understood religion until I encountered science."

"That kind of fits well." Mint said.

"Here's Ranpha's. I never understood the war dance until I encountered a much younger woman."

The girls laughed. "Well, we already knew that." Forte commented.

"I never understood a trail of tears until I encountered a sad handjob."

"What the heck, Mint?!" Milfie gasped.

"I told you none of my cards would fit this one." Mint moaned.

Chitose continued. "I never understood shiny objects until I encountered a chaos emerald."

"It was the best I could do." Milfie said.

"Lastly, I never understood sexual tension until I encountered doin' it in the butt."

Ranpha spluttered.

"Okay, Forte's pair wins this."

"Thanks and it's my turn." Forte drew the next black card. "What's the new fad diet?"

"What's a fad?" Mint asked.

"It's another word for short-term weight loss." Vanilla replied.

"And that's why I keep myself fit at all times." Ranpha added.

"Okay, let's see what the new fad diets are." Forte said, picking up the cards. "Land mines."

"That's an explosive way to lose weight." Milfie laughed.

"An asymmetric boob job."

There was a moment of awkwardness among the girls.

"Umm next is a PowerPoint presentation."

"This is getting odd now." Mint said.

"Exchanging pleasantries."

"LAME!" Ranpha commented.

"Last is…pffft surprise sex!"

The girls laughed.

"Surprise sex is just so off the wall, I'll give that the win."

"Oh that'll be mine." Chitose replied receiving the card.

Milfie drew the next card. "What gives me uncontrollable gas?"

"YOUR COOKING!" The other girls answered, teasing her.

Milfie grinned, "Okay, just for that, you all gotta eat your least favourite food that I'll cook after we finish playing this game."

"What?!" Mint exclaimed.

"You wouldn't dare!" Ranpha protested.

"Knowing Milfie, she would anyway." Chitose warned lightly.

Milfie gathered them up and read them. "Let's see what gives me uncontrollable gas…poorly timed fart jokes."

"I wouldn't be surprised." Ranpha teased.

"Binging and purging."

Mint giggled.

"Uhhh, three dicks at the same time?"

Forte laughed, slapping her leg.

Milfie was beginning to blush in bright red. "Sloppy inter-species makeouts."

Chitose chuckled.

Milfie felt embarrassed. "I don't wanna know the last one but I have to…oh my god, this is wrong!"

"If it's wrong, just read it." Forte said.

"Alright…inserting a mason jar into my anus."

That did it, all of the girls nearly fell over in laughter.

"Whoever drew that card, you're amazing!" Ranpha said in fits of laughter.

"Yeah that card wins it, even if it was a little mean." Milfie replied. "Who had the mason jar?"

Mint raised her hand. "I did." she took the card from Milfie. "Surprised?"

"Not really, we always knew there was a naughty side to you." Forte replied.

Mint picked the next card. "And it's my turn…it's a blank out there."

Ranpha sighed. "Yeah this one is gonna suck, no matter what cards we pick."

"Let's not jump to conclusions." Vanilla said.

"Well because you think so, I'll just read the answers in one go." Mint picked up the cards. "Dog eat dog world, 1,000 years of pain, tesla coil, tentacle porn and god eat god world."

"Isn't that like the first one?" Chitose asked.

"Yeah, both of those cards are too similar. Well because I wanna clarify my hidden naughty side, tentacle porn wins it. Who had that?"

Vanilla raised her hand.

"Nice one Vanilla, it has been a while since you scored a point."

As Mint gave Vanilla the card, Ranpha drew the next black card. "Behold! My trap card, blank!"

"Oh these answers are gonna be quite disturbing." Mint said.

"As if we weren't doing enough of that already." Chitose replied.

Ranpha picked up the cards. "Okay girls, let's see what your trap cards are…a Godzilla attack."

"Oooh, just like that movie we watched last month." Milfie said.

"Going super sayian."

"I don't think that would happen to any of us." Vanilla commented.

"Necrophilia."

"Now that is super gross!" Mint exclaimed.

"Wait, what is necrophilia?" Milfie asked.

Mint whispered into her ear and Milfie's cheeks began to bulge.

"Moving along quickly." Ranpha said. "Pterodactyl eggs."

"Really, people still study dinosaurs at this day in age?" Forte asked.

"And lastly…a can of whoop-ass."

The girls giggled, even Vanilla joined in.

"Yeah the last one is just so random and it's too good to pass up, who dropped this can?"

"I dropped it." Chitose replied, giggling.

"My go." Vanilla said. "I drink to forget blank."

The girls were silent before choosing their cards. "Alright, I drink to forget incest."

"Ewww, yuck!" Milfie exclaimed.

"I drink to forget half-assed foreplay."

"I knew Normad was a bad influence on you." Mint teased.

"I drink to forget grave robbing."

"Why would anyone want to do that?" Chitose asked.

"I drink to forget my genitals."

Forte and Ranpha laughed.

"And I drink to forget loneliness."

"Woah…that's really sad, but we know that isn't true." Forte commented.

Vanilla hummed. "My genitals wins this and please don't make fun of my gender."

"That's mine." Ranpha replied. "And none of us would ever do that."

"Okay, three rounds down and Ranpha still leads." Chitose said. "And I gotta use the bathroom."

"Me too." Milfie added, leaving the room.

"I'll get the lollipops." Mint said as she went into her room.

* * *

 **Galaxy Angel Awesome Points Scoreboard:**

 **Chitose Karasuma: 3**  
 **Forte Stollen: 3**  
 **Milfie Sakuraba: 2**  
 **Mint Blamanche: 2**  
 **Ranpha Franboise: 5**  
 **Vanilla H: 3**


	4. Round Four

Round Four

A dozen of eaten lollipops later and the girls were back in a circle, ready to go for the next round.

"Let's continue." Chitose said, picking up the next black card. "Lovin' you is easy because you're blank."

"Looooovin yoooou." Milfie sung. "Is easy because you're beautiful…"

"I'd laugh if that was your actual answer." Mint said.

Chitose picked up the chosen cards. "Alright, lovin' you is easy because you're…my first kill."

Ranpha and Forte fell over in laughter.

"Lovin' you is easy because you're being on fire."

"Wow, I've heard of burning love, but that is way too extreme." Mint chuckled.

"Lovin' you is easy because you're a lesbian."

"Is that how they do anime fan art?" Milfie asked.

"Lovin' you is easy because you're a magic hippie love cloud."

"Meh!" Ranpha said.

"And lovin' you is easy because you're an oncoming train."

"That doesn't quite make sense." Vanilla said.

"A lot of good ones, but first kill is the clear winner." Chitose declared. "Who had her first kill?"

"I did and it was the first of many." Mint replied, taking the card. "Against automated fleets, okay?"

"Yeah, we know." Forte giggled. "What is Batman's guilty pleasure?"

"Who's Batman?" Ranpha asked before she plucked up a little. "Wait, isn't he that guy who had that cape that we discovered a long while ago?"

"Yeah, that was him." Forte gathered up the chosen cards and read them out. "Let's see what his guilty pleasure is…seduction."

Ranpha turned away, blushing slightly.

"Mouth Herpes."

"How is that a guilty pleasure?" Mint asked.

"Yeast."

"Booo!" Ranpha jeered.

"Concealing a boner, well maybe…and lastly. Taking an arrow to the knee."

"Ouch!" Milfie commented.

"Hmm, that wasn't a good round to be honest, but seduction wins it." Forte declared.

"Cheers!" Milfie said, taking the card and picking up the next card. "Oh this one is good…What never fails to liven up the party?"

"Oh you should be playing that card, you would've been perfect for it." Chitose said as she went through her cards. "Maybe next time."

"Mine's a throwaway." Forte sighed.

"Same." Ranpha added.

Milfie gathered the cards up. "Okay, what never fails to liven up the party…roofies?"

"What are those?" Mint asked.

"Forte and I looked it up, you don't wanna know." Chitose replied.

Milfie continued. "Expecting a burp and vomiting on the floor."

"Too obvious." Ranpha commented.

"Destroying the evidence."

"Well, you would want to after vomiting." Mint said.

"Sexy pillow fights."

All of them giggled.

"And lastly…an M16 Assault Rifle."

Forte raised both her eyebrows.

"Sexy pillow fights wins, because I can see that happening during a slumber party one day and it seems like fun." Milfie declared.

"That's mine…and Creta says it is." Chitose replied, taking the card.

"Moving right along." Mint said, picking up the next card before she frowned. "Really? This is a card?!"

"Oh this is gonna be fun." Forte smirked. "What does it say?"

"I really don't wanna read it…"

"Just read the damn card, will you." Ranpha said.

Mint sighed. "Fine…how did I lose my virginity?"

"That's it?" Forte asked. "What's so bad about that?"

"Alright, time to use my best card here." Ranpha muttered with a smirk.

"This might work." Vanilla said, putting her card forward.

Mint was blushing in embarrassment over the question, but she got rid of it and read the answers. "How did I lose my virginity…a bag of magic beans?"

"Like jelly beans in the candy store?" Chitose asked.

"Well I love my candy a lot but I'd never lose my virginity to that, next one is…Peanut Butter Jelly Time."

"Peanut butter and jelly, no thank you." Milfie said.

"My collection of high-tech sex toys."

"Oh my! I never knew you were that kinky." Forte teased.

Mint blushed in bright red again. "Boogers." Mentioning it got rid of her red blush.

"That's not possible." Vanilla said.

"Last one is…" she gasped before throwing it down. "…oh for Lady Shatyan's sake, that is just disgusting!"

"Read the card, Mint." Ranpha said.

"I have a feeling this is yours, right?"

Ranpha smirked.

Mint groaned. "…dick fingers."

It took a moment for the image to form in all of the girl's heads.

"OH MY GOD!" Forte yelled.

"HAHA!" Ranpha laughed.

Milfie's cheeks bulged and turned green before she ran out of the room and to the nearest bathroom, Chitose was in shock whilst Vanilla couldn't say a word.

"Honestly, Ranpha!" Mint said in a firm tone.

"That was for the dumb blonde card earlier." Ranpha teased. "Don't think that I'm an idiot."

Mint rolled her eyes as Milfie returned, looking a little unwell before sitting back down. "…as vile as it was, your card outshined the rest…just take it."

"Thank you…now we're even." Ranpha teased taking the card. "Next one up…oh great, the one card I hope wouldn't be there. During sex I like to think about blank."

"Do we want to know what you think about during that?" Chitose asked.

"You shouldn't have unprotected sex." Vanilla added.

"I said it before and I'll say it again." Ranpha replied. "Don't say things you don't have to!" She gathered the chosen cards. "Alright, during sex I like to think about a disappointing birthday party."

"What?! But my birthday parties are never disappointing." Milfie protested.

"During sex I like to think about scalping."

"That must hurt." Chitose commented.

"During sex I like to think about not wearing pants."

"Way too obvious." Forte said.

"During sex I like to think about a magical tablet containing a world of unlimited pornography."

"Oh my, a lot of detailed information, but I won't judge." Mint teased.

"And during sex I like to think about…powerful thighs. Aww yeah don't mess with me and my martial arts! That is the clear winner, who had powerful thighs?"

Chitose raised her hand and took the card from Ranpha.

Vanilla picked up the next card. "Why can't I sleep at night?"

"None of mine are good for this." Milfie moaned.

"I think I have this one." Chitose said.

"Nah, I've got you all beat here." Forte boasted.

Vanilla picked up the chosen cards. "Why can't I sleep at night?" she read the first card. "The passage of time."

"Whoever played that card, you suck!" Ranpha spoke rudely.

Vanilla shook her head. "Sneezing, farting and coming at the same time."

"Ewww!" Milfie teased. "You should see Doctor Cera about that."

"Pooping back and forth forever."

"Gross!" Mint commented.

"Pistol whipping a hostage."

"Nah that would be something I'd most likely do." Forte said.

"Finally…stranger danger."

"At least we're travelling in space." Chitose said.

"It wasn't a good round, but the second card wins."

"Thank you kindly." Forte replied taking the card.

"So the fourth round is over and I am catching up with you, Ranpha." Chitose said.

"Bring it on, girls." Ranpha boasted. "I ain't gonna let go of pole position!"

* * *

 **Galaxy Angel Awesome Points Scoreboard:**

 **Chitose Karasuma: 5**  
 **Forte Stollen: 4**  
 **Milfie Sakuraba: 3**  
 **Mint Blamanche: 3**  
 **Ranpha Franboise: 6**  
 **Vanilla H: 3**


	5. Round Five

Round Five

Chitose picked up the next card to start the fifth round. "Airport security guidelines now prohibit blank on airplanes."

The girls were silent in picking their cards until Chitose had five chosen ones. "Airport security guidelines now prohibit full frontal nudity on airplanes."

"Nah, that's too obvious." Ranpha said.

"Airport security guidelines now prohibit a man on the brink of orgasm on airplanes."

"And now traveling just got cleaner." Mint giggled.

"Airport security guidelines now prohibit wifely duties on airplanes."

"Well, it's a good thing none of us are married." Forte said.

"Airport security guidelines now prohibit a freckled ballsack on airplanes."

"Ewww, who would wanna see that?" Milfie asked.

"And lastly, Airport security guidelines now prohibit children on leashes on airplanes. Well that could've gone a lot better, but man on the brink of orgasm wins." Chitose declared.

"Oooh, that's mine." Milfie replied taking the card.

Forte picked up the next card. "It's a pity that kids these days are getting involved with blank."

"I shall use my best card here." Vanilla said, smiling.

"Ugh, I have nothing good for this at all." Ranpha moaned, putting her card forward.

Forte read the card as she got the five chosen cards. "It's a pity that kids these days are getting involved with coat-hanger abortions."

"Is there anything in the cards that isn't gross?" Milfie asked.

"Hey you should be used to it by now." Forte continued. "It's a pity that kids these days are getting involved with a nice cup of tea."

"Ha! Sounds like someone familiar, doesn't it Mint?" Ranpha teased.

"Quiet blondie!" Mint exclaimed.

"It's a pity that kids these days are getting involved with white privileges…uhh moving along, It's a pity that kids these days are getting involved with pffft...a madman who lives in a police box and kidnaps women."

The girls laughed, not noticing that Vanilla was smiling happily.

"Okay and last one it's a pity that kids these days are getting involved with self-loathing."

"Uhhh, I don't get it." Mint said.

"That madman card wins it, who drew that?"

Vanilla raised her hand.

"Well played, Vanilla." Forte said giving her the card.

Milfie picked the next one up. "What don't you want to find in your Kung Pao chicken?"

"What is Kung Pao?" Mint asked. "We've never heard of a place like that."

"It could only be a restaurant from several centuries ago." Vanilla replied.

Milfie gathered the chosen cards. "Let's see what we don't wanna find in our Kung Pao chicken…natural selection."

"Boring!" Ranpha commented.

"Druids."

"You mean those people who cover themselves in robes?" Chitose asked.

Milfie shrugged. "A bit of slap and tickle."

"So the chicken comes back to life and does that?" Forte chuckled.

"Crucifixion."

"Before you girls ask, that isn't my card." Vanilla said.

"And lastly…testicular torsion…yuck!"

"I don't think we like this one much." Chitose said.

"Slap and tickle wins it, even though this wasn't a good round."

"That's mine and I am queen." Mint replied, taking the next card. "That's right, I killed blank. How you ask? Blank."

"Now this should be a good one." Ranpha said, picking her two cards.

"So reverse order and knowing our pair as before, yes?" Chitose asked.

The girls nodded as Mint gathered the pairs up. "Here's Vanilla's. That's right, I killed lockjaw. How you ask? A mating display."

"That's not too bad." Chitose said.

"Ranpha's. That's right, I killed a middle-aged man on roller skates. How you ask? A homoerotic volleyball montage."

"So you killed him by giving him an erection?" Forte laughed.

Mint shook her head. "Milfie's. That's right, I killed The Fal-Vasc. How you ask? A fanny fart."

The girls erupted in laughter across the room.

"What the fudge?! That is awesome!" Ranpha exclaimed in fits of laughter.

"Oh my, haha! We still have two pairs to go." Mint said as she picked up the other cards. "Forte's. That's right, I killed 400 years of colonial atrocities. How you ask? Dropping a chandelier on your enemies and riding the rope up."

"Oh that one is good, but it doesn't beat the last one." Ranpha said.

"And Chitose's. That's right, I killed shapeshifters. How you ask? Daddies brown sauce."

"So you just pour the liquid over a shapeshifter and they die?" Vanilla asked.

"Maybe, but Milfie's pair wins by a landslide." Mint declared.

"Yay!" Milfie took the card.

"Time for the current leader's turn." Ranpha said. "Hey Reddit! I'm blank. Ask me anything." The girls were quick to choose their cards and Ranpha collected them. "Hey Reddit! I'm the miracle of childbirth. Ask me anything."

"So you were blessed by the heavens?" Vanilla asked with a smile.

Ranpha continued. "Hey Reddit! I'm Smegma."

"You probably don't wanna ask what that is." Chitose said.

"Hey Reddit! I'm crippling debt."

"So you like beating the crap out of money?" Forte teased.

"Hey Reddit! I'm BATMAN!"

All of the girls laughed for a moment.

"And lastly. Hey Reddit! I'm flesh-eating bacteria."

"Argh! Get away from me!" Milfie laughed.

"That was good girls, but BATMAN gets that cause that was just insane and I loved it."

"And I thought I played the worst card I had." Forte replied taking the card.

Vanilla picked up the next card. "I get by with a little help from blank."

"Might as well use my most tasteless card here." Forte said.

Vanilla gathered the chosen cards up. "I get by with a little help from the pirates life."

"Meh!" Ranpha said.

"I get by with a little help from the morbidly obese."

"That just isn't right." Chitose said.

"I get by with a little help from famine."

"What the heck?!" Milfie asked.

"I get by with a little help from horrifying laser hair removal accidents."

"Ouch!" Mint commented.

"And I get by with a little help from synergistic management solutions."

"See, now that makes sense." Forte said.

"I think we all hate this card." Vanilla said. "The last card wins it, the rest were undignified."

"That's mine and maybe next time we'll skip that card." Mint replied.

"So we're past the halfway point and we have a four-way tie for second place." Chitose said.

Suddenly, sirens went off across the entire ship.

*SIRENS* *SIRENS*

 _Hostile automated fleet detected! All angels report to the hanger and prepare to sortie!_

"Well girls, looks like our game's gonna have to wait." Forte said as she got up.

"Oh yeah! Let's go kick some automated fleet ass!" Ranpha exclaimed.

They then left Chitose's room and dashed to the hanger to prepare for combat.

* * *

 **Galaxy Angel Awesome Points Scoreboard:**

 **Chitose Karasuma: 5**  
 **Forte Stollen: 5**  
 **Milfie Sakuraba: 5**  
 **Mint Blamanche: 5**  
 **Ranpha Franboise: 6**  
 **Vanilla H: 4**


	6. Round Six

Round Six

After a successful mission of destroying an automated fleet, the girls returned to Chitose's room to continue their card game.

"Whew! That was great." Milfie said.

"We all needed that in some way." Mint added.

"Now we're relaxed and ready to get back into it." Forte said. "Let's go."

Chitose began the round with the next card. "Now at the Natural History Museum: An interactive exhibit on blank."

"I'm throwing this one away." Vanilla said.

"I think I can work with this." Ranpha muttered.

Chitose began reading them. "Now at the Natural History Museum: An interactive exhibit on doing crimes."

"So we would get to be criminals and get away with it?" Mint asked.

"An interactive exhibit on taking off your shirt."

"That would depend on who's taking whose shirt off." Ranpha said.

"An interactive exhibit on the blood of Christ."

"Oh lord, please forgive whoever played that card." Vanilla prayed.

"An interactive exhibit on swooping, I think we do a lot of that space during a battle. Lastly, an interactive exhibit on having big dreams but no realistic way to achieve them."

"Woah, that's deep in a way." Forte said.

"Doing crimes would be a lot of fun, so that wins it."

"Give it here." Ranpha smiled, taking the card.

Forte read the next card. "Alternative medicine is now embracing the curative powers of blank."

"Well I'm not winning this one." Mint sighed.

"I might." Milfie said, placing her card forward.

"Okay girls." Forte read the cards. "Alternative medicine is now embracing the curative powers of growing a pair."

"Well who doesn't wanna kick Tact Mayers in the balls?" Ranpha asked.

The other girls stared at her, blinking.

"Anyways." Forte said. "Alternative medicine is now embracing the curative powers of raptor attacks."

"Another dinosaur card?" Chitose asked.

"Alternative medicine is now embracing the curative powers of a foul mouth."

"Sounds like blondie in a nutshell." Mint teased.

"Quiet, candy hugger!" Ranpha answered back.

Forte sighed. "Alternative medicine is now embracing the curative powers of laying an egg."

"Uhhh how does that work?" Milfie asked.

"And finally, alternative medicine is now embracing the curative powers of The World of Warcraft."

"Sounds like something out of a game." Chitose said.

"I'll go with raptor attacks, because I would love to see that being a cure." Forte said.

"Hooray!" Milfie replied. "And it's my turn again." She picked up the next card. "Introducing the amazing superhero/sidekick duo! It's blank and blank!"

The girls drew their cards forward and Milfie started with Vanilla's pair as before. "I'll just read the cards so we're not wasting time. It's lactation and alcoholism."

"My cards were no good for this one." Vanilla said.

"It's a space whale and a sober dragon who doesn't care for flames."

"I know, mine weren't good either." Ranpha said.

Milfie continued. "It's catapults and a gassy antelope. Well if you say so, Mint. Forte's is, it's Kuromie and homeless people."

"Wait, you can't have a group of people as a superhero sidekick partner, right?" Chitose asked.

"I guess not, and finally. It's Altar boys and Oompa-Loompas."

"That was an off the wall combo." Forte said.

Milfie pondered for a second. "Ranpha's pair win this, because it made sense in a way."

"See girls, I know exactly what people wanna see in a comic book." Ranpha boasted.

"Let's just move on." Mint said. "Oh this suits me well!" she cleared her throat. "When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate blank."

The girls drew their chosen cards and Mint read them out. "When I am a billionaire, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate winking at old people."

"That sounds half-assed." Forte said.

"A mad cow."

Milfie giggled.

"An entrenched class system."

"So graduates would be taking lessons underwater?" Chitose asked.

"A tribe of warrior women."

"I hope that comes with face painting." Milfie said.

"And lastly…ugh…sperm whales."

"Ewww, gross!" Ranpha exclaimed.

"Sperm whales is too much for me, but entrenched class system would be a big interest for me."

"And that belongs to me, thanks." Forte said.

It was Ranpha's turn once again. "Kids, I don't need drugs to get high. I'm high on blank."

"Is that what you call as new and improved training?" Mint teased.

"Yeah, real funny…" Ranpha collected the chosen cards. "Kids, I don't need drugs to get high. I'm high on dogging."

"Oooh, started early, have you?" Forte teased.

Ranpha sighed. "I'm high on a time travel paradox."

"But we can't time travel, so that would be impossible." Vanilla said.

"I'm high on a gentle caress of the inner thigh."

"I didn't know you'd like being touched that way." Chitose giggled.

"I'm high on a tasteful sideboob…psssh yeah right. Lastly I'm high on dirty nappies, now that is gross!" Ranpha rolled her eyes. "Inner thigh wins it, the rest were total BS."

"Yay, I'm the least BS girl here!" Milfie exclaimed.

Vanilla picked up the next card. "War! What is it good for?"

"I can thank of several vulgar answers." Forte replied, choosing her card.

Vanilla began reading the chosen cards. "Mouth herpes."

"Sounds awful." Mint said.

"Vigorous jazz hands." The girls remained silent. "An icepick lobotomy."

"Yikes!" Milfie exclaimed.

"Being hunted like a fox."

"Wait, we don't have foxes in space or any other animals for that matter." Ranpha said. "Well apart from the space rabbits and that big whale on this ship."

"And lastly, exactly what you'd expect. Well I find that to be awfully true, so the last card is the winner."

"I wasn't expecting that, but thanks." Mint said.

"Ranpha still leads but Milfie is catching up very quickly." Chitose said.

"Just like old times, right?" Milfie asked.

Ranpha sighed. "Please don't remind me of pilot school."

* * *

 **Galaxy Angel Awesome Points Scoreboard:**

 **Chitose Karasuma: 5**  
 **Forte Stollen: 6**  
 **Milfie Sakuraba: 7**  
 **Mint Blamanche: 6**  
 **Ranpha Franboise: 8**  
 **Vanilla H: 4**


	7. Round Seven

Round Seven

After a quick bathroom break by some of the girls, they returned back into a circle for the next round as Chitose picked up the next card. "Blank: kid-tested, mother-approved."

"Why do I think this one is gonna be lame?" Ranpha asked.

"Maybe Tact's instincts are rubbing off on you." Forte teased.

"Shut up! He was a skirt chaser and you know it."

"Well, we can't deny that." Mint said.

Chitose gathered up the cards as they were chosen. "I'll just read the answers out. A live studio audience, agriculture, police brutality, cottaging and uncontrollably guzzling cum."

"Wow, that is all seriously messed up!" Forte laughed.

"Which is why I give the last card the win."

"Thank you." Mint said, taking the card whilst grinning.

Forte read the next card. "A recent laboratory study shows that undergraduates have 50% less sex after being exposed to blank."

"Yes I can finally use this card I've saved for a while." Chitose said.

"Mine's gonna be a throwaway." Mint said.

"Like before, I'll just read the answer because that card is too long to read." Forte said, reading the cards. "World peace, kamikaze pilots, chivalry, puberty and embryonic stem cells."

"Embryonic stem cells is the winner and I think we know who drew that one."

"Thank you, Forte." Vanilla said, smiling and taking the card.

Milfie picked the next card but as she saw it, she thought of an idea. "Hold on girls, I'm gonna get a costume for this." She ran out of the room and when she came back, she was dressed in a sharp grey suit with a fake cat strapped on the beltline. "But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you blank." She read out in a villainous voice.

"Uhhh Milfie, are you okay?" Ranpha asked. "Cause that was weird."

Milfie took off the suit and was back in her normal clothes. "Of course I am, it's what it says on the card. I was just acting it out like we saw in that movie with James Bond in it."

"Oh yeah, wasn't that on a DVD we found among a pile of Lost Technology once?" Chitose asked.

"Yes, but we should focus back on the game." Mint replied. "And Milfie, we need to talk about you borrowing my costumes."

Milfie was ready to read out the cards. "But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you inappropriate yodelling."

"That's a new one." Ranpha said.

"I must show you sweet, sweet vengeance."

"Too obvious." Forte commented.

"I must show you preteens."

"Now that's wrong." Vanilla said.

"I must show you a robust mongoloid."

"There's a card for that, really?" Mint asked.

"And finally, I must show you fading away into nothingness."

"That's pretty much everything if you ask me." Chitose said.

"I'll go with sweet, sweet vengeance just for the irony of those kinds of movies."

Vanilla raised her hand, taking the card.

Now it was Mint's turn again. "Coming to a theatre near you this year, blank: The musical."

"Hmm, this could be a smart move." Forte said.

"Or a clumsy one, depending what's on it." Ranpha added.

Mint collected the chosen cards. "Alright girls, coming to the West End this year, Darth Vader: The musical. Well I guess that could work for some people. Cheeky bum sex: the musical."

"Who's the one starting early now?" Ranpha teased.

"Robocop: the musical. I don't think we have those existing."

"Well not yet, bio technology is quite complicated." Vanilla said.

"Cybernetic enhancements: the musical. Well maybe…and perfunctory foreplay: the musical."

"Wow, some of those answers are almost the same." Forte said.

"Yeah they are, but I'll give the point to cheeky bum sex."

"Thanks Mint." Chitose said as she took the card from her.

"What's that sound?" Ranpha asked, reading the next card and the girls selected theirs in record time and Ranpha read them out. "72 virgins."

"But there's only six of us here." Forte laughed.

"Or more if you count the other employees who work on the ship." Chitose added.

"Fingering."

"Ewww." Milfie commented.

"Wet dreams."

"I hear that those can turn into a nightmare." Mint said.

"Crippling social anxiety."

"I don't understand that one." Vanilla said.

"And getting so angry that you pop a boner."

"Meh." Forte said.

"72 virgins is the winner."

"And I am proud to be one of them." Mint bragged, taking the card which got the other girls laughing.

Vanilla picked up the next card. "What's there a ton of in heaven?"

"Yep, time to get rid of this dumb card." Forte said.

Vanilla picked up the chosen cards. "So what's there a ton of in heaven…being marginalised."

"Well maybe…" Mint said.

"Oestrogen."

"I'm not sure if I like where this is going." Milfie said.

"Funky fresh rhymes."

The girls giggled.

"A buttload of candy."

"Sign me up for that!" Mint said happily.

"And the inevitable heat death of the universe."

"Damn! That is depressing to the extreme." Forte commented.

"I like to go with funky fresh rhymes, I found it to be creative."

"Yay! I am creative in music and cooking!" Milfie replied as Vanilla gave her the card.

"Three rounds to go and now we have a three-way tie for first place." Chitose said.

"This is getting exciting." Mint said. "You won't be in the lead for long."

"Ha!" Ranpha dismissed. "Just bring it!"

* * *

 **Galaxy Angel Awesome Points Scoreboard:**

 **Chitose Karasuma: 6**  
 **Forte Stollen: 6**  
 **Milfie Sakuraba: 8**  
 **Mint Blamanche: 8**  
 **Ranpha Franboise: 8**  
 **Vanilla H: 6**


	8. Round Eight

Round Eight

"Are we ready, girls?" Chitose asked and they nodded. "What has been making life difficult at the nudist colony?"

"Oh we're gonna find out too much about ourselves here." Mint said.

"I think we crossed that line since the second round." Forte laughed.

Chitose gathered up the girl's chosen cards. "Nubile slave boys."

"That's just wrong." Vanilla said.

"Savagely beating a mascot."

"Oh that poor mascot." Mint commented.

"Insatiable bloodlust."

"Wow, we've got a few issues with this one." Forte said.

"Moral ambiguity."

There was silence.

"And finally, Ryan Gosling riding on a white horse."

"Who the heck is he?" Ranpha asked. "Wait, why am I asking that?"

"Probably because you wanna know if he's handsome or not." Mint answered.

"Beating a mascot wins."

"That's mine, thanks." Milfie said, taking the card.

"And for now, that puts you in the lead, Milfie." Chitose said.

"Don't get ahead of yourself, though." Forte warned as she picked up the next card. "In a pinch, blank can be a suitable substitute for blank."

The girls took a few minutes before they're ready to give them to Forte. "Okay Vanilla's is, in a pinch, a web of lies can be a suitable substitute for Big Bird's brown, crusty asshole."

"That's not bad, but I think there's better." Chitose said.

"Ranpha's pair. Tidal waves can be a suitable substitute for fabricating statistics. Uhhh, no offence Ranpha, but that's boring."

"Hey, they were the only cards I could match together." She exclaimed.

"Riiiiight. Mint's is, 24-hour media coverage can be a suitable substitute for Medieval Times Dinner & Tournament."

Vanilla giggled silently.

"Milfie's is, hipsters can be a suitable substitute for historical revisionism."

"Well that makes sense in some odd way." Mint said.

"And Chitose's, pffft hahaha! Ripping into a man's chest and pulling out his still-beating heart can be a suitable substitute for revenge fudging."

The girls all laughed. "Oh that is funny, despite it being so wrong." Milfie said.

"Yeah, Chitose's pair wins."

"Thanks." Chitose replied.

Milfie picked up the next card and gasped. "Noooo, I don't want this card!"

"Seriously, you're being a total wuss after seven rounds?" Ranpha frowned. "Get on with it."

"Awww okay." She sighed. "When I pooped, what came out of my butt?"

"EWWWW!" they all replied.

"We're so gonna sink to a lower level after this." Mint said.

Milfie was hesitant, but she picked up the chosen cards. "A passionate latin lover."

"Woah! That is one exotic dump!" Ranpha laughed.

Milfie bushed, before continuing, "Shaft."

Forte fell over in total laughter and Ranpha joined in.

"Clenched butt cheeks."

"Oh my, you would certainly have that after dumping out all of that." Mint teased.

"Shitting out a screaming face."

"That is morbid to the extreme." Vanilla said.

"And finally…the worst pain imaginable. Times two!"

"Like giving birth?" Chitose asked.

"Alright, these were a little mean but I know that this is only a game." Milfie said. "Shaft is the winner."

"See, I know you inside out, for both right and wrong reasons." Ranpha teased, taking the card.

"Uhhh moving on." Mint said, taking a card. "Doctor, you're gone too far! The human body wasn't meant to withstand that amount of blank."

"It's been a long time but I think my card can win with this." Vanilla said drawing her card forward instantly.

"Bleh! I have nothing good for this one." Ranpha said.

"Okay, I'll just read the answers because it'll take too long." Mint picked up the first card. "An Etsy steampunk strap-on."

"Isn't that more like a modified version of a strap-on?" Forte asked.

"Chicken farmers."

"Huh? I don't understand that." Milfie said.

"Eating a taco."

"We seem to have drawn food-related cards." Chitose said.

"Quiche. Now I'm beginning to feel hungry. And finally…another disgusting card but it has to be read…literally eating shit."

Ranpha fell over laughing before wiping a tear.

"This wasn't right, but I have to go with the most vulgar answer, who had the last one?"

"That was me." Vanilla replied, taking the card from Mint.

"Wow! Well played, Vanilla." Ranpha applauded before drawing the next card. "Awww, sick! I just saw this skater do a 720 backflip into blank!"

"That reminds me, does anyone here do any skateboarding?" Chitose asked.

"I think I saw a cow riding on one." Mint replied whilst choosing her card. "But I must've been dreaming."

Ranpha gathered up the cards. "I just saw this skater do a 720 backflip into gladiatorial combat. Now I would watch that for real. Next one is…Dorito breath, well maybe. Next is being a dinosaur."

"That's the third dinosaur-related card we've seen tonight." Milfie said.

"I just saw this skater do a 720 backflip into a nuanced critique."

Mint pondered. "I don't think skateboarding was judged by a panel. It's all about space boarding these days."

"And finally, I just saw this skater do a 720 backflip into Stockholm syndrome."

Forte spluttered. "What?!" she laughed.

"Gladiatorial combat wins it, because I can totally see that being on TV." Ranpha declared.

"I'd like to see that too, which is why I picked it." Chitose replied, taking the card.

Vanilla drew the next card. "The secret to a lasting marriage is communication, communication and blank."

"Dumping Tact Mayers!" Ranpha exclaimed which got the girls laughing.

"You should get a point for that!" Forte laughed. "But anyways, mine's a throwaway."

Vanilla read them out. "The secret to a lasting marriage is communication, communication and a crappy little hand."

"Well that's what they get for pleasuring themselves too much." Mint said.

"A low standard of living."

"To be married and be poor, that's really sad." Milfie said.

"A plunger to the face."

"Ha! If I had one, I would do that to my husband all the time if he got out of line." Forte giggled.

"Deflowering the princess."

"Ooooooh" All the girls went.

"It's a good thing that Shiva isn't here to hear that one." Chitose said.

"And lastly, getting abducted by Peter Pan."

"Help! Peter Pan is kidnapping me, help!" Milfie exclaimed, acting like a character. "Hahaha!"

The others giggled.

"Getting abducted wins, I really liked that one." Vanilla said.

"Woohoo!" Mint exclaimed taking the card.

"And we end this round with a three-way tie for first still present." Chitose said.

"Let's take a break for now so we pull ourselves together." Forte suggested.

The other girls nodded in agreement.

* * *

 **Galaxy Angel Awesome Points Scoreboard:**

 **Chitose Karasuma: 8**  
 **Forte Stollen: 6**  
 **Milfie Sakuraba: 9**  
 **Mint Blamanche: 9**  
 **Ranpha Franboise: 9**  
 **Vanilla H: 7**


	9. Round Nine

Round Nine

"Alright girls, this is the next to last round and I think to make it more interesting, we're all going to read our own answers from now on until the end of final round." Chitose declared.

"Upping the ante, eh, sounds good to me." Forte replied.

"Tonight on 20/20: What you don't know about blank could kill you."

"What a card to start this round." Mint said.

"I may have this one." Ranpha boasted.

"Okay and we'll go in alphabetical order." Chitose declared.

"Alright, what you don't know about a dollop of sour cream could kill you." Forte said.

Milfie was up next. "What you don't know about an ether-soaked rag could kill you."

"That's messed up, but I think we're all used to it now." Vanilla said.

"What you don't know about a squadron of moles wearing aviator goggles could kill you." Mint said.

"That's very creative." Milfie commented.

"What you don't know about Jeff Goldblum could kill you." Ranpha said.

Forte nearly fell over in laughter. "I don't know why, but I wanna laugh so hard at that, even though we don't know who that is."

Vanilla read her card. "What you don't know about a fortuitous turnip harvest could kill you."

"Yikes!" Milfie exclaimed.

"For me, Ranpha's was the best."

Ranpha did a victory dance before taking the card.

Forte picked the next card. "Before blank, all we had was blank."

The other got their cards ready and Forte read them in reverse alphabetical order. "Here we go with Vanilla's pair. Before whining like a little bitch, all we had was pumping out a baby every nine months."

"Wow…that's really dark, Vanilla." Ranpha said quietly.

"Before whipping a disobedient slave, all we had was nunchuck moves."

The girls started at Ranpha. "What, to me that sounds awesome."

"Ooooh kaaay." Forte continued. "Before grandpa's ashes, all we had was basic human decency. Well if you think so, Mint. Before getting hilariously gang-banged by the Blue Man Group, all we had was me."

"What the hell, Milfie?" Ranpha asked before laughing.

"Lastly, before we had another shot of morphine, all we had was the hose."

"Remind me not to ask for an operation from you, Chitose." Mint teased.

"I've gotta go with the last one, because it kind of rings true."

Chitose smiled, taking the card.

"My turn!" Milfie said, picking up the next card. "Oooh, another costume idea." She ran off and when she came back, she was no dressed in an outfit from the 1960's with sunglasses. "What's harshing my mellow, man?" she asked in a groovy, calm voice.

The other girls could only stare at her, before looking at their cards.

"Milfie, we need to talk about taking things literally later." Forte said.

"You need to remember that you shouldn't borrow my costumes without permission." Mint added.

"Maybe tomorrow, anyways I'll just read the answers out in one go if that's okay." Milfie replied before gathering up the chosen cards. "One Ring to rule them all, oncoming traffic, dining card cut-outs of the cast of "Friends", survivor's guilt and Loki, the trickster god."

"Dining card cut-outs should get that, I can totally see Mint having a party like that." Forte said.

"Agreed, you get the point, Mint."

"I thought mine didn't have a chance, but thanks." Mint replied, taking the card from Milfie. "And it's my turn." She picked up the next card. "You haven't truly lived until you've experienced blank and blank at the same time."

"I bet I can beat you all with these." Forte boasted.

"We'll see, girl, we'll see." Ranpha said.

"Here we go," Mint said, drawing the cards. "Vanilla's, you haven't truly lived until you've experienced all of this blood and scrotal frostbite at the same time."

"Ouch!" Milfie exclaimed.

"Ranpha's, living in a trashcan and the black Power Ranger at the same time."

"Just like that action figure we saw in the toy store." Chitose said.

"Milfie's, a man in yoga pants with a ponytail and feather earrings and an army of skeletons at the same time."

"Sounds like your normal day at the picnic." Ranpha teased.

"Forte's, crushing Mr. Peanut's brittle body and tiny nipples at the same time."

"I think there are somewhat better answers." Vanilla said.

"And Chitose's, fetal alcohol syndrome and the day that birds attacked at the same time."

"That would be a day to remember or maybe to try and forget." Forte commented.

"Well it's a close one, but Vanilla's pair just seems to match the closest to being perfect."

Vanilla took the card from Mint as Ranpha drew the next one up. "Charades was ruined for me forever when my mom had to act out blank."

"Yes! My best card can finally be out in the open." Forte said happily.

"I have one of my best cards to play too." Chitose added.

"Then this should be good." Ranpha replied. "Chitose, go."

"Charades was ruined for me forever when my mom had to act out graphic violence, adult language and some sexual content."

The girls nearly fell back in complete laughter. "That is awesome." Ranpha said. "Forte, go."

"Charades was ruined for me forever when my mom had to act out taking a man's eyes and balls out and putting his eyes where his balls and then his balls in his eye holes."

Suddenly, the whole room erupted in laughter.

"OH MY GOD!" Ranpha yelled whilst falling over. "That is the most screwed up thing I've ever heard….damn girl!"

Forte folded her arms with a smug look.

"Okay, let's keep going…Milfie, go."

"Charades was ruined for me forever when my mom had to act out power."

"Meh! Mint, go."

"Charades was ruined for me forever when my mom had to act out the new Radiohead album."

"Oooh, just like that video of someone's head above the water." Milfie said. "That was so depressing to watch."

"Yeah…Vanilla, go."

"Charades was ruined for me forever when my mom had to act out being awesome at sex."

The girls laughed.

"That would've been a good answer, but Forte's wins by a landslide, you rocked this round."

"I knew I would." Forte replied, taking the card.

As soon as the girls calmed down, Vanilla drew the next card. "The healing process began when I joined a support group of victims of blank."

The girls got their cards ready in seconds.

"A slightly shittier parallel universe." Chitose said. "Reminds us of when we discovered the EDEN planet."

"The human body."

"Pretty Pretty Princess Dress-Up Board Game."

"A sofa that says "I have style, but I like to be comfortable."

"And mine is…an unhinged ferris wheel rolling towards the sea."

"Oh that's wrong, but I wanna laugh so hard." Forte laughed.

"I'll go for the sofa one, I'm sure Tact would appreciate our sense of humour." Vanilla said, giggling away.

"Thanks! He always did have a fondness for making us laugh at the expense of Lester." Mint said as Vanilla gave her the card.

"Alright, the final round is coming up and Mint is catching up with Ranpha." Chitose said. "This is the homestretch now, have one more quick break and we'll be back."

* * *

 **Galaxy Angel Awesome Points Scoreboard:**

 **Chitose Karasuma: 9**  
 **Forte Stollen: 7**  
 **Milfie Sakuraba: 9**  
 **Mint Blamanche: 10**  
 **Ranpha Franboise: 11**  
 **Vanilla H: 8**


	10. Round Ten

**Last one readers and I hope you managed to get a good laugh out of this story. :)**

* * *

Round Ten

A short break later and the angels were ready to go around the circle one last time.

"Bring it on, this is where I'll really shine at the end." Ranpha boasted.

"Good thing this is the last round." Mint said. "I don't think I can take any more laughter."

Chitose picked up the next card to start the final round. "During high school, I never really fit in until I found blank club."

The girls chose their cards, ready to read them. "In alphabetical order, so go."

"During high school, I never really fit in until I found my manservant, Claude club."

"During high school, I never really fit in until I found the land of chocolate club."

"Mmm, sounds very tempting, sign me up for that." Mint said before reading her card. "During high school, I never really fit in until I found running naked through a mall, pissing and shitting everywhere club."

The girls laughed and Ranpha looked at her card. "During high school, I never really fit in until I found The Quesadilla Explosion Salad from Chili's club."

"During high school, I never really fit in until I found chugging a lava lamp club."

"That is all kinds of odd, but running naked through a mall just about gets it."

"Thanks." Mint replied.

"My final turn." Forte said. "Hey baby, come back to my place and I'll show you blank." She chuckled. "Oh and I want you all to put on your best sexy voices whilst reading your answers."

"Oooh, I like the sound of that." Ranpha replied.

Chitose read her card in her attempt at a sexy voice. "Hey baby, come back to my place and I'll show you drinking ten 5-hour ENERGY's to get fifty continuous hours of energy."

"Hahaha! Good start." Forte said. "Milfie, go."

Milfie cleared her throat. "Hey baby, come back to my place and I'll show you three months in the hole."

"Gosh Milfie, you sure are keen." Chitose teased.

Mint got up on her legs and stood by the door with her card. "Hey baby, come back to my place and I'll show you Velcro."

"Not bad, but this is how to do it." Ranpha laughed before regaining her composure and putting on her sex appeal. "Hey baby, come back to my place and I'll show you flying robots that kill people."

"Wow! That would turn men off at the same time as turn them on." Forte commented.

Vanilla read hers. "Hey baby, come back to my place and I'll show you some kind of bird-man."

Ranpha and Forte laughed. "Oh my, my ribs are beginning to hurt from all this laughing." Ranpha said.

"Okay, well it was close but Ranpha wins it, just for that sexy voice."

"Thank you, I do try." Ranpha took the card.

"My last turn as queen." Milfie said. "And what did you bring for show and tell?"

The girls chose their cards quick and each of them read theirs out.

"Blowing some dudes in an alley."

Ranpha and Forte chuckled.

"A botched circumcision."

"That doesn't sound healthy." Vanilla said.

"Unlimited soup, salad and breadsticks."

"And that definitely does sound healthy." Milfie said.

"Some douche with an acoustic guitar."

Mint snickered.

"The entire Internet."

"That's quite an answer there, Chitose gets the win."

Chitose took the card and it was Mint's last turn to be queen. "Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me blank."

"Time to use the worst card I have." Milfie said as the others got theirs ready.

Chitose read hers. "Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me girls that always be textin'."

"Wow, I didn't know you were into girls." Ranpha teased.

"Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me vomiting mid-blowjob."

The girls spluttered, trying not to laugh.

"Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me blood farts."

"Ewww, you're cleaning up my room floor after that, Milfie" Chitose teased.

"Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me spending lots of money."

"Isn't that ironic?" Forte asked.

"Money can't buy me love, but it can buy me going around punching people."

Mint giggled. "I find that one too funny to pass, Vanilla wins this one."

"My turn for one last time." Ranpha said, drawing up the penultimate card. "My gym teacher got fired for adding blank to the obstacle course."

"Oh you should be playing that instead of choosing an answer for it, you would've been perfect for it." Milfie said.

Ranpha shrugged. "Ah well, maybe next time…anyways, Chitose, go."

"My gym teacher got fired for adding disco fever to the obstacle course."

"So you would be dancing your way to the end?" Ranpha asked. "I'm okay with that. Forte, go."

"My gym teacher got fired for adding demonic possession to the obstacle course."

"Not bad…Milfie, go."

"My gym teacher got fired for adding a pile of squirming bodies to the obstacle course."

"Gross, but I can see why that's true in some way…Mint, go."

"My gym teacher got fired for adding the thin veneer of situational causality that underlies porn to the obstacle course."

Ranpha laughed. "Oh I think we have a winner here. Vanilla, go."

"My gym teacher got fired for adding nothing to the obstacle course."

"So the gym teacher was fired for being lazy too?" Mint asked.

"I guess so. Anyways, Mint, you win this one outright."

"Thank you." Mint replied.

"It's my final turn." Vanilla said, picking up the last card of the round. "Finally! A service that delivers blank right to your door. Read out the best answers you've got."

Chitose read out her last card and the others followed. "Finally! A service that delivers a vagina that leads to another dimension right to your door.

"Finally! A service that delivers radical profiling right to your door."

"Finally! A service that delivers that ass right to your door."

"Finally! A service that delivers having sex on top of a pizza right to your door."

"And finally! A service that delivers the most demanding chasm of his mouth right to your door."

"Those are all good." Vanilla said, giggling away. "But the sex on top of a pizza card is my favourite, so I pick that as the winner."

"Wow, thanks Vanilla." Mint replied.

"And that is the final round over and Mint has officially won the game by one point!" Chitose declared.

"Congratulations Mint, you're the most horrible person in the game." Forte complimented.

"Awww thank you girls, I'm honoured." Mint replied before laughing.

"Alright, let's pack away this game." Chitose said before she looked around. "We've made a bit of a mess in this circle, let's clean ourselves up too before we call it a night."

"Got it, Chitose, we'll make this clean as it was before we started." Milfie replied as they cleaned the room. "Anyways, that was a really fun game, even though it was horrible at times."

"Yeah, it was awesome because I was leading all the way until the final round." Ranpha said. "But I'll win it next time."

"I don't think I would want to play this again." Vanilla said glumly. "I will need a day of praying several times to clear my actions from tonight."

"Aww don't be sad, it's just a game." Chitose said as she hugged her.

"Yeah, the point of this game was just to be complete and horrible jerks for fun." Forte added.

Soon the room was clean and it was time for bed, all the girls got into a group hug and said their goodnights before each of them left Chitose's room and back to their own rooms.

Chitose put away the card game box on her table and pulled out her duvet and sleeping bag, as she got in and made herself comfy before going to sleep. Just then, there was a knock on her door.

"Oh, come on in." Chitose said as the door opened.

In came Milfie with a plate of some food and to Chitose, it didn't smell good.

"Ohhh, what is that?" she asked nervously.

Milfie smirked. "I told you I was gonna cook your least favourite meal."

 **THE END**

* * *

 **Galaxy Angel Awesome Points Final Score:**

 **Chitose Karasuma: 10**  
 **Forte Stollen: 7**  
 **Milfie Sakuraba: 9**  
 **Mint Blamanche: 13 Winner!**  
 **Ranpha Franboise: 12**  
 **Vanilla H: 9**


End file.
